On November 13, an online roundtable conference was held on the results of the penitentiary project “Happy Family School. Stage two”. It is implemented by the Gomel Public Association "Social Projects" in partnership with DVVI in Belarus.
The event presented the results of the project in correctional facilities #24 and #4, as well as presented a new training program "How to become a successful father", aimed at reestablishing communication between fathers serving sentences and their children.
Correctional facilities together with the participants and graduates of the course, members of the Penitentiary Department of the Ministry of Internal Affairs of the Republic of Belarus, journalists as well as other public organizations from all over the country which are actively working with this topic joined the round table conference.
The director of the organization "Social Projects" Nina Kekukh told us in details about the courses "Happy Family School" and why it is so important to continue working in this direction expanding and strengthening the filed.
Informal dialogue based on the principles of trust, respect for each other, the absence of criticism
Some convicted women serving sentences in correctional facilities themselves refuse to make calls required by law and meet with their children. That is because they don’t know what to say. The courses "Happy Family School" raise not the simplest for many people but very important issues of motherhood and parenting.
The project began last year in Gomel Correctional Facility No. 4 with the support of the international adult education organization DVVI in Belarus. Then the first group of 15 convicted women went through the full training cycle - 10 lessons. Now such courses have already been launched in two correctional facilities and, what is more, convicted persons themselves conduct them.
The training takes place not in the form of standard lectures, but in the form of study groups. Each participant is active, the method of free conversation is used - an informal dialogue on the principles of trust, respect for each other, and the absence of criticism. This is very important when convicted persons share their experiences realizing that they are not alone in such a situation and, most importantly, that everything can still be changed.
How to mend parent-child relationships when mom is in prison?
Nina says that their team has been working in penal institutions for many years. They constantly communicate with convicted persons and try to find out exactly what problems and needs they have. One of the main problems of women is the difficulty in family relationships with their children.
- Many women who are in prison have themselves grown up in a socially disadvantaged environment: they often have no positive experience with their parents. When they become adults, they form exactly the same type of families. Sometimes it is accompanied with antisocial behavior and alcohol abuse. All these facts destroy the maternal instinct. When such women are imprisoned, family ties are often cut off. They do not see their children and they themselves are in a very difficult psychological and emotional state.
On the other hand a woman becomes more mature. She has enough time to think about her own values, make shift in them. They feel guilty and anxious about the absence of family ties. But they are even more worried about the fact that they do not have any basic knowledge and understanding of how these parent-child relationships could be mended in such a situation?
"This makes convicted women burst into floods of tears and this is a huge work on self-improvement"
In the last lessons of the course "Happy Family School" video messages to a child are recorded and self-made toys are produced. Nina admits that this is the most emotional part of the course for both coaches and women.
First, by this time, the world of many women has already completely changed. And they start to come up with ideas of proper values. Writing such a letter addressing your child with whom you may not have spoken in years requires serious internal preparation. What words should be said and what emotions should be expressed? This makes convicted women burst into floods of tears and this is a huge work on self-improvement." Secondly, sewing toys with your own hands is another opportunity to get emotional charge and to put your love into the workpiece and pass it on to the child in the form of a finished product. Based on its many years of experience, the «Social Projects» team is confident that successful resocialization of convicted people is impossible without establishing harmonious relationships in their families. It is the family that most often motivates the convicted person's desire to integrate back into society. But it is impossible to restore such ties without helping these people because the emotional world of people in prison becomes very poor, many of them have become cold-hearted over the years of being there.
Those who have already finished their training will themselves teach other people without the help of third-party organizations
A very important part of the project is the training of coaches from among convicted women who have already completed the course. Thus, "Social Projects" can transfer their activities to the next correctional facility (and this happened in 2020), but it doesn’t mean that the course "Happy Family School" in correctional facility № 4 is over. Last year, at the initiative of the public association, 35 women studied, but this year the women themselves organize a course in the correctional facility. This course is thought by graduates of the previous year.
- The first course is always the most important for us. In addition to the main work we also look closely at the participants: who is most motivated and knows the vocabulary. We select 4-5 people after the first stage of training and start teaching them the technology of the study group. They help us conduct classes with the second group, and then we completely delegate all powers to them. We only hold consultation meetings and monitor the process. If any problems arise, we try to help solve them.
This year the course "Happy Family School" started in Gomel Correctional Facility No. 24. A similar training course for convicted men is also being developed.
Nina says that the main indicator of the program's effectiveness is the feedback from the women themselves. Many people say that the course completely turns their world upside down and the information received has a bomb effect in a positive sense. But now the knowledge has been acquired and they can begin to correct their mistakes right at this moment.
This effect is also confirmed by the administration of the correctional facility during the speech at the round table conference. The psychologist says that earlier many convicted women refused to make calls and meet with their children because they did not know what to say to them. But now the situation has changed and women are using every opportunity to establish communication. The administration of «ИК №24» also notes the positive impact of the course on the discipline in general. Many women ask for additional materials on issues that are not discussed in the course in order to study the topic on their own.
Last year, two women graduated from the “Happy Family School” course were released. They maintain relationships with their mates who are still in the correctional facility. In letters to their mates the women say that everything is fine in their family and that they managed to get a job. But so far, according to Nina, not much time has passed. Many women remain in correctional facilities so they only have the opportunity to influence the situation at a distance.
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